The Thoughts
‘crazy how you think sometimes’, the voice beside her erupted in laughter. ‘I know right’, she responded with a quick smile and slumped her body into the upholstery. Sarah, named to a petite light skin female. She dropped her phone, picked up the book close to her — Inferno by Dan Brown, and dove into the imaginary.
‘I asked what were you going to eat Sarah’, same voice shouted as she was pulled out into reality. ‘Anything you have Ay’, she replied as she closed the book looking at him. ‘Are you alright?’ ‘yup’, with a nodding and gave a smile.
She looked at him, ‘crazy how this world is right?’ ‘yeah…’ ‘am I alone?’ in her cracked voice. He turned facing her, about a few feet away, ‘what do you mean by that?’
‘Am I alone like when I feel like I’m a walking corpse more times than normal, when I strive for perfection in a world that is barely striving for its habitants, when I feel things that I cannot explain to people who mean a lot to me, when I use books and music to run away from reality? Am I truly alone or is this normal?’ as she looks to his face for reassurance.
‘I cannot say I feel exact but I relate to some aspects. Have you always been feeling this way?’, he replies as he moves to sit beside her.
‘Most times, yes, because I am truly scared. The irregularity I feel is crazy atimes and I know I am quite young but truly I feel confused and….’ A long pause as her eyes droop to the floor and she continues, ‘I do not know how to explain how or where I feel it but I just know I do and I want to know if I am alone so I would know if this fight I am fighting is worth it or in vain’.
There is a long pause. He puts his hand on her knee, squeezing it. ‘It is worth it. You are not alone. Maybe because it is not talked about enough, that may be why you may feel alone, but it is present and everyone feels it. Some different from others.’ He reaches for her hand and squeezes it, ‘You do not have to be grateful or happy for the pain of living, but you can find the beauty in what grows in its wake and your daily experiences’ and he leaves a kiss on it.
Her quirky smile erupts and a little tear drops, ‘How do you always know what to say, even when I say nothing?’. He shrugs, smiles and lets out a whisper, ‘if only you knew’. ‘what did you say?’. ‘Nothing Sarah’, and pulls his sleeve to cover his scars. He makes a move towards the kitchen stopping halfway, ‘what did you want to eat again?’. She replies with the same ‘anything you have’ and slumps back into the upholstery, grabbing the book.
